What I Learned Today

Its not very often that I listen to a popular contemporary speaker and think that what they are saying speaks to me. I guess I'm somewhat of a skeptic, or maybe I just think that my life is too complicated for anyone to really relate. Anyway, the women's Bible study at our church has been working through Beth Moore's study on the book of Esther. It has been fantastic. And a bit ironic. On more than one occasion she has made a point that really, truly was both applicable and appropriate for the portion of the path I'm walking with God these days. (By appropriate, I mean that it actually honors God as the God I know Him to be, instead of molding Him into something that fits into my life. Does that make sense?)

The first time was when she spoke of our tendency to freak out when God calls us to tackle something truly difficult, because usually we don't think He has very good timing. In other words, we say to God, "How can I possibly do THAT?! Don't you see what my life is like right now?!" That has pretty much been the underlying feeling in my heart regarding our adoption since we received our son's autism diagnosis. Being moved to adopt was a big enough stretch for me, but then we were thrown that curve ball. We struggled with whether or not to continue and did eventually put things on hold for a short while. However, we knew we'd be back on board -- and that really scared me. These days, while I wait and wait -- ironically encouraging myself with the knowledge that we WILL eventually hold our little girl -- I keep going back to that thought..."How can you possibly ask me to take all this on, Lord?"

Our session last week was about trusting God enough to know that if and when the things we fear most happen, God will be God. He will not let us be destroyed and will, in fact, redeem us to glory with Him no matter what.

Today, the topic was timing...and waiting. The idea of God's timing being the perfect timing, etc is, of course, not a new one to me -- especially at "such a time as this", so to speak. (A little Esther quote there!) What really threw me was what Beth said when she closed the session. She read the well-known verse: "...but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." (Isaiah 40:31) She pointed out the difference between waiting for something (an occasion, a promotion, a baby, etc.) and waiting for the Lord. When is one's strength renewed? When one waits for the Lord -- for His timing, for His purposes, for His plan fulfilled in His will.

When I think about it now, it seems pretty obvious, like something I've known all along. But I sure appreciated the reminder today.

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Speaking of waiting, my darling hubby has left on a business trip and we three are left behind waiting for his return. (I have an alarm -- with a key fob! -- and I know how to use it!) Hubby is an author and illustrator -- among other things! -- and is speaking with his brother and fellow author at the Christian Book Expo in Dallas. I definitely don't give him enough props for all the hard work he does, so here's a link to their blog.

In his absence, he left the boys with a pictorial chart so they can determine just when he will be home. Our days are now, courtesy of my three year-old, known as "Armadillo", "Lizard", etc. As in, "Are we going to Grandma's on 'Lizard' or 'Cactus'?" The photo doesn't do it justice.

You will note that I am now able to upload photos again. This isn't because we found our cord. Seems we'll have to order a new one directly from Kodak. No, we had to shell out money for a card reader so we could empty our memory cards onto our computer and thereby, in the meantime, be able to use our camera again. (We also have to remove the camera battery to charge it on a battery charger. Blah! So much work!) Nursery photos will be forthcoming, I promise. We just have a few more things to do in there before the big "reveal". In the meantime, enjoy a few "before" photos -- one which we took for our dossier (in which we shoved all the junk out of the line of sight for the photo and angled it so the room looked clean and nice -- shh! don't tell!) and the other of aforementioned Hubby applying the primer over the ugly brown with which the prior owners had covered the walls AND ceiling. Some browns are nice...others are not. Oh, and I threw in a picture of me looking oh-so-cute in my grubbies putting together furniture.